February 13, 2025
My wrist still hasn't fully recovered. It's a side effect of my previous depression. I can't torment myself physically and mentally no matter what in the future.
I feel like I have wasted half a year and am unable to live and think normally. I am very sad about the passage of time.
I have to give myself an explanation in the past six months, otherwise I will be sorry for the wasted time.
There are currently three people in this world who are related to me.
My father has severe dementia and is unable to communicate. He was also cold and speechless when he was young, and now he has basically no emotions at all.
Brother, I have lived abroad for many years. I have very different concepts and thinking. I am relatively rigid and pedantic by nature. I have no real thinking about human relationships and life, so I have nothing to communicate with. Although many things have good intentions, the methods are often pedantic and the results are often bad. If we communicate a lot, we will often have different opinions and this will affect me. Last time it was very serious and it was related to my father.
My girlfriend, I don’t want to describe it too much and I don’t know how to describe it. We live in separate places and our relationship is like online dating. It’s dispensable and there’s no feeling at all.
Therefore, it is time to understand that in this world, you are the only one, and you can only live with yourself as the center. We are all ordinary people with limited energy, and the storms of our own lives are difficult to deal with. Why should we bother to consider these relationships? If we don't live well, everything will be meaningless.
Many relationships have to be severed. There is nothing to regret. I don’t want to live in torture and pain. It’s not worth it.
Time is running out, live your life well, the only important thing is to remember.
After this moment, I hope that I will recover little by little in all aspects, and that I will no longer be troubled in my future life.